Kamikaze Pheasant

POLICE CALLING FOR WITNESSES OF FATAL COLLISION

"There was a collision on the Buckingham Road this week, involving one vehicle. 

Phyllis Pheasant, jumped in front of a Ford KA at approximately 10.37, Monday morning. Emergency services were called but Phyllis died at the scene. 

The KA was travelling at approximately 60mph, when Phyllis, thought to have attempted to take her own life, jumped out of no where. The driver tried to swerve but was unsuccessful. 

Police are calling for all witnesses and family members to come forward to identify the feathers."

*****

Jokes aside, I could not feel more awful about this. I've been driving for just under 18 months and I hadn't experienced any road kill until New Years Day this year when I hit a pheasant. Monday saw my second victim, another pheasant, who we'll call 'Phyllis' for ease of reference. 

Now many of you are probably thinking 'yeah right, bit of a coincidence, definitely a murderer' and that I was playing human Angry Birds or something, but I risked my life and the lives of others trying to save this bird; an emergency stop from 60 mph is no mean feat. Let's just say it was lucky there was nothing behind me ... either way, there was genuinely nothing I could have done. 

I personally believe it was suicide. One minute Phyllis was innocently at the side of the road, the next she was a cloud of feathers behind me. She literally just jumped out of no where which leads me to believe maybe she was depressed and trying to take her own life.  This doesn't stop me feeling any less guilty though. She might have had a husband, several young children and I've killed her... 

With this being my second victim already this year it worries me that this is going to become routine each month and before long, I will be the cause of a pheasant extinction ... 

It took me a good few hours to come to terms with what I'd done and the way it affected me got me thinking how much of a hypocrite I am; I eat meat and yet I clearly couldn't personally take an animal's life. Don't get me wrong, I'm not thinking of turning vegetarian or anything; bacon and KFC are an integral part of my existence and equally, I'm not criticising those who do kill animals, on behalf of the squeamish of us, I thank you. In all seriousness though, the majority of us eat meat, and clearly don't know where it comes from, in light of the horse meat scandal, and we couldn't do the deed ourselves; it's quite literally just handed to us on a plate. Do we really have the right to consume animals with this frame of mind? 

Just a little food for thought ...

RIP Phyllis. I hope you'll be my last road kill for a while.