'Did you find everything you were looking for today?'

For many, there's nothing better than a bit of retail therapy. I am not one of those people. I just don't have enough patience: all the hustle and bustle, not finding what you want, poor customer service ... I'd much rather pay that extra £3.95 for delivery, and buy it off the Internet. 

The problem is I'm never organised enough to order clothes in time. I'll know I need something to wear weeks in advance sometimes, and I'll just panic buy something I don't even like, for the sake of something to wear, and most of the time I never wear it again. 

If that isn't bad enough, then you get to the till and they ask 'did you find everything you were looking for today?'

I cannot stand this phrase. 

It's so insincere, rehearsed and robotic. 

They don't care if you've found everything you were looking for. The answer is either 'yes' hence why I'm stood at the till, or simply 'no', but none of us ever say 'no' do we? We tell them what they want to hear, to make their jobs easier because quite frankly, if you said 'no', I doubt they'd be able to string a sentence together because you've caught them off guard, they haven't been taught an alternative response. Customer service is yet another tragic break down in communication.

When I say 'yes thank you', what I really want to say is: 

'Well no actually. Why are 80% of your sizes 'small' when 60% of the entire population are obese? How many people do you know that are a size 6 with a 34 inch leg? Why were there no members of staff around to help me find what I was looking for? Why would I want your opinion anyway, when you clearly hate your job and dress like a tramp?'

Now I'm not saying all shop assistants are like this. In fact this week, I went to Milton Keynes and was welcomed by people on the door of at least four shops with, 'if you need any help, please let me know'. This was incredibly refreshing and this is the phrase shop assistants should be taught. Granted, it was accompanied with a cheesy grin, but at the end of the day we are prepared to give large chains our money, and yet most of the time, we leave unsatisfied. 

I am the worst culprit for this and it isn't just limited to clothes. I leave the hairdressers unhappy. If they don't have what I want in Tesco, I settle for something that's more expensive. There are several unworn items in my wardrobe which I meant to take back but didn't have the guts to. 

However, I am gradually learning from those around me. I went food shopping with my Nan last week and was at first embarrassed by her complaints. To me she was complaining about everything but then I realised that without her speaking her up, she would have spent around an additional £5 on her shopping bill. This doesn't sound much, but say this happens every single week, that's £260 a year; £260 that the average family, let alone pensioners, cannot afford. In hindsight, it wasn't even complaining but merely standing up for what should be available such as when they only had the expensive milk, or only the small packets of toilet rolls, or when their small print on discounts is misleading; she will not be fooled. 

Similarly, my Mother will not be screwed over by companies. A little while a go, a bottle of coke exploded all over our car through no fault of our own. One complaint and we got a compensatory voucher. Similarly, she found a stone in her Bombay Mix. It sounds ridiculous but considering how much we all shell out every week on commercial items, the least we can expect is good service and good quality. 

It is widely publicised that small independent stores are dying and is it any wonder when we are so easily brought into the large commercial chains. The tragic thing is that these are the kind of stores that aim to please. They value your custom. They relate to your needs. They will help you find everything you're looking for. 

Therefore next time I'm looking for an outfit, I will approach the girls casually hanging around the till, not actually doing very much, and ask them if they have anything other than a size 8. Next time they don't have what they are advertising in Tescos, I will ask them if they have any out back. Nine times out of ten, they do have these items, they are merely hanging it out to see how many of us will naively settle for second best. 

Next time, when they ask whether I found everything I was looking for I will either be able to sincerely say 'yes' and genuinely thank them for their help, or they won't even get the chance to ask me this question, as I will have gone elsewhere, to somewhere where they do have what I'm looking for.